Skoda Rally Blog

This weekend was always going to be a bit different to the other events I’ve done with Paul. Firstly, it’s quite a way away – 170 miles, in fact, so the longest trip for any of the events we’re going to do (about as far as I’ve been doing any rally, in fact), and secondly it wasn’t tarmac, it was to feature a mixture of surfaces – concrete, gravel, tarmac, grass and, it turned out, cow poo!

Firstly, we had to stay somewhere on Saturday night, which meant a twin room at a pub in Burnham on Crouch, not too far from the rally, but when they said “basic twin” they weren’t kidding. The worst beds I’ve seen in a long time (they did a passable impression of a banana once you’d laid on them), and the room was infested with Crane Flies – as we’d see the next day, Essex is the insect capital of England, if not Europe. And it was hot in there too. We had to watch the inevitable failure of England to get through a penalty shoot-out (which I must be getting used to now as it was only half an hour before I’d forgotten about it), and then a restless night’s sleep with the locals making a LOT of noise. Wonderful!

Sunday dawned crystal-clear and warm, and we got to the event on time, but it seemed everyone else was late – you were supposed to arrive in numerical order, and while I was offloading, number 27 turned up. When we’d got scrutineered and signed on, number 15 arrived. This would set the pattern for the day – it’s certainly not a complaint; this was the most relaxed stage rally I’ve ever taken part in.

In addition to being a mixed surface event, it’s also the only Multi-Venue event we’ll be doing – the others are based at a single airfield or similar, whereas this event featured four areas, so we needed to drive on the road between stages, which is a challenge as you have to follow ‘tulips’ which show junctions and distances, but as both of us had done these before (although the other way round) this would be no problem, we hoped.

Stage 1 was a little one based on a disused airfield by Bradwell nuclear power station. The course was pretty tight, and as it was Paul’s first time driving the car on the gravel tyres and also his first time driving a car on the loose, we took it easy. Immediately he found that it behaves quite differently, and it took the first stage to get the hang of, it, with some unintentional understeer and a couple of times with the back getting loose under braking. His sense of smell isn’t great, which was a bonus as some of the stage was marked out by what had to be the biggest pile of poo I’ve ever seen! There was a moment where we got caught out by a really tight hairpin, but that worked out OK, but that was that. We looped round and did Stage 2 which was much like 1, but with a different ending. No problems, then off to SS3. This was the first one involving grass, based on a massive farm, so there was also concrete and tarmac to take care of as well as a bit of gravel. Already someone had gone off (grass tells tales, you see), and despite it being dry, it was bouncy and therefore a bit random in places. Also, the maps weren’t totally accurate, so some note-making was done on any stage we’d re-run so we could take it more quickly/safely next time. Finally in this loop was Stage 4 which was a re-run of stage 1, and there were no real problems there – Paul was getting the hang of things and just trying to go faster.

Back to ‘service’, which involved eating, mostly. There’s not a lot to do on the Felicia, apart from check things over, so we just made sure the wheels wouldn’t fall off. They didn’t, all day.

Next up were two stages that were new and a fair distance away, so we had a half hour road section. Now, what I should mention here is that it was a really hot day by now, so it was getting pretty hot in the car. And it’d been dry for a long time, too. Which made the ground reasonably predictable, but also meant it was pretty dusty. When we arrived at Stage 5, Coney Hall, a 2.6 mile farm-based stage, there was a delay, and it was a chance to hide in the shade while the problem was cleared. Once we got going, it was one of those stages where you just wished you had a really, really quick car – there were a couple of long straights (one about a mile long) where you could go absolutely flat out (we were, but when I say ‘flat out’, I’m not really thinking of a 68bhp Skoda), so a quick car would make up a lot of time. And next up was the mothership, Wraywick. This is an 8 mile stage, with just about every surface – gravel, grass, concrete, tarmac, and mixtures of them too. The first gravel section was really fun as there wasn’t anything to hit if it went wrong apart from some wheat. But nothing went wrong. The maps were a little deceptive though! Then there was a bumpy grass section, and then the ditches appeared. Most of them ran parallel to the track we were on, and they were fairly deep, so if you’d had a couple of bad bounces there would be a problem. Above about 55 was getting hairy, so we just kept around that speed with the throttle helping pull the car in the right direction. There were a couple of bounces that seemed dodgy at the time, but I’m sure they weren’t anything bad in hindsight. Another tarmac section and more gravel, and then more long, bumpy straights. This one had a little surprise though – someone’s car in it! It showed how deep the ditch was – the car was on its side, and you could only see the upper doors and rear light. Not good at all! We passed on the opportunity to join them, and made it to the end of the stage, although on all the straights Paul needed to towel down, which made for some interesting drifting if he chose to close his eyes!

Next we were off to Service 2, which was at a different service location. Except, of course, we don’t have a service crew, so we were just going to pull in and order a hot dog from the catering trailer. Except just as we were getting there, they were leaving! DISASTER!!!! So, we just nosed around, and cooled off using the hose there. There had been a Mk2 Escort behind us on the last stage, but he’d not been able to get too close due to the huge plume of dust we’d chucked up behind us. And it turned out he’d also crushed his exhaust as well, so things weren’t going well for them. Then there were re-runs of the last two stages which went OK – we were over the half way point by now, so no point in having a moment. I’d made notes on the last two stages so we could go quicker, which paid off – certainly a lot less hairy, despite things having cut up and become more bumpy in places. Back to service 3…. for the hot dog I’d promised myself an hour previously!

The rest of the stages were re-runs, of the airfield and Stage 3. Each time it was getting better, with Paul getting things more together, although still taking it easy so we could get a finish and a signature. So, no heroics (aside from an intentional sideways moment which just elicited a “you knob” comment from me!), but we did get to the end of Stage 12, and even get back without needing fuel at any point – because of the low speeds involved and not wheelspinning all over the place, it was probably quite economical overall!

Once we were at the finish, got the most important thing – a signature from the Clerk of the Course. This means we’re 50% of the way to Paul getting his licence so we can do WRGB. And that’s a 100% finishing record for him as a driver. We can only go in one direction from there, alas. But let’s hope that doesn’t happen too soon.

It was a long slog home (4 hours, including stops) with the trusty, rusty trailer, and the car is absolutely filthy – every single part of the car (inside and out) is dusty, and it’s a sort of clingy, clay-like dust which is a pig to remove. So I’ve got a LOT of cleaning to do, and a few minor things to fix before the next outing, Fat Albert Stages, 29th July.