Skoda Rally Blog

Well, I say swapping roles, it’s not entirely that.  I’ve got myself a seat tomorrow on Fat Albert Stages navigating for Mike Dunning in his 1600 Peugeot 205.  I’ve done Fat Albert a couple of times before, and it’s a great event; the weather is supposed to be good tomorrow as well, which is a bonus, as is, of course, being able to turn up, pay some money and then not have to worry all day if the car breaks as for once I won’t be paying for any repairs.  I’ve got all the maps all ready to go, and Google Earth makes a very handy tool when wanting to work out distances as the maps aren’t to scale.  I’ll take my camera and let you all know how it goes.

Today was the Mini Tempest Stages 2008, at Longcross, the great test track near Bracknell (just next to the M3), in Ray Read’s Audi Quattro Turbo – me nagivating for him as his regular nav, Stuart, couldn’t do it. Did the 78 mile trip to there in an amazing 1 hour 5 minutes, handy as I’d realised my made-up lead to path my intercom into his was wrong, so I thought I’d have time to do it when I got there. Unfortunately Ray was a bit delayed so we didn’t get to the service area until about 8am, got everything set up and I sorted the problem once we’d scrutineered (nice to have NO worries about the car at all when scrutineering – the joys of being a navigator) and done documentation.

The entry today was strong – there was some quality machinery there, including some ex-works F2 cars (FWD, lots of power, wide bodied, such as Maxi 306 and Nissan Sunny), and the usual selection of Escorts, Cosworths, Evos and so on. A real novelty being seeded at 33, much less waiting around, although Ray wasn’t happy being “that far back”! We got to the arrival, and got everything ready for the stage. Ray was a bit nervy as he’d not driven the car in anger since 2006, but once we were ready at the start line he seemed fine, and off we went – 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, GO!!!!

This car is quick. I’ve been in some fast road cars, but you can’t really give a car anywhere near this amount of beans on the road. Ray was going for a finish, so he wasn’t snapping the car around, but it was still a very quick, smooth drive. The stage was a bit damp so it was a bit slippy, and we did the first part of the stage (there are two splits per lap, making for intense traffic situations) including the run up the steep hill really well – everything was going OK. The next time round Ray missed the split where we should have turned left, braking a bit too late and taking some cones out in the process – we later found out we got a max for that, which was a pity as it wasn’t the best laid-out split in the world, but ho hum….

One the next time round, we were going down the back straight (about 600 yards) when BOOOF! A puff of what looked like steam came from under the bonnet, and the car stopped. We’d blown an Intercooler pipe off, and Ray had to get out to disconnect the air flow meter (which would now be seeing no airflow) to allow the car to run back to the start. We did the rest of the stage at a “crawl” (Although still quicker than the Skoda, I think!), and got a time of 10:43, much quicker than the maximum we thought we’d avoided. Alas, no!

Once in service it was fairly straightforward to sort the intercooler pipe problem (although if it would hold was another matter as the flexible pipe was a little on the short side), and time to go back out again for a re-run, SS2. This time we were far less nervous – no problems, hopefully, on this run.

This time, things went better. A LOT better in fact – everything went to plan – we didn’t catch any traffic at any point, although there was an Escort Cosworth we thought we’d catch, but he was finishing as we went round for another lap. There was a mega-quick Corsa (car 20) which was as fast as the Quattro. Which wasn’t slow – I saw nearly 110 on the speedo on the back straight, but it felt faster. Ray was driving smoothly and in a really controlled manner, and it felt good; there was the odd clunk here and there (apparently from the springs on the spring seats when unloaded), but mostly just speed and grip. Going round the snake was interesting – there is a crest which is more like a flat-topped hill, and going over that the car got airborne, with the front going very light – you couldn’t see anything for a fraction of the second, and each time I hoped there’d be nothing to see but road when vision returned. All the splits went fine, all the merges were clear, and a chicane had been destroyed which helped us at one point – the Quattro is very wide which demands precision and care when going through, slowing us considerably. Still not slow though.

With everything going OK, our time? 8:18. 22 seconds off the fastest, which was good considering the controlled and safe way Ray was driving – at no point did it seem hairy (apart from the brute speed) – there were no dramas, just acceleration and braking which was always powerful but never out of control. Brilliant.

Back to service, nothing to do really. Well, not for me – I don’t know much about the car, and the guys all had their routines, so it was out of my hands.

SS3 was a small change from 2, with part of the track altered and run in the opposite direction, but mostly the same. Once more we got a good start, and saw a few cars off, some of them looking really messy. Around half way through the stage, there was a noise from the back of the car – it sounded road-speed related, as if the diff was complaining, and only happened on load. In addition as we “crawled” round to the end of the stage to avoid a maximum (which the car was so quick elsewhere would still mean around 6 minutes of loss if we took one) the engine seemed to be losing power, and becoming noisier and hotter. Dammit.

Once back in service, the back of the car was inspected and seemed OK, but would only really show up under load. Stu got in the car to listen and we noticed the exhaust seemed noisy at the front, and the car was smoking a lot. When they got back, we had another look under the bonnet and I noticed that one of the bolts that holds the exhaust part of the turbo in place (the housing that goes round the impeller) was missing, and it looked like another one too. It turned out I was right – the housing was actually loose, explaining the loss of power. There wasn’t a lot of time left, so Stu bolted it back up, and put a new bolt in as best he could. We set off to the SS4 arrival, and got there just in time. We’d have to suck it and see…

5, 4, 3, 2, 1… GO!

No boost.

No power.

No point.

We limped round and short-circuited the stage, getting a time of 1:30, as we’d done very little of it – best to save the car as it seemed to be losing a lot of oil.

Back in service, we found that the turbo had in fact seized completely. Game over.

After the disappointment had worn off (I kept it quiet, but clearly I was gutted as it’s not often I’ll get to go in a car as quick as this), it was time to pack up and go home. As I said to Ray – “no-one died”. Obviously it was a massive disappointment as we’d only really got one full stage at speed, and 2 full speed stages in total (half of SS1 and SS3), but he had a lot more to worry about than I did – I could just go home and wash my suit and that was largely it. Ray’s got to fix the mighty beast before his next event, in 5 weeks’ time. I hope he gets it all sorted, as he and all his crew are nice guys, and the car is amazing. Hopefully I can get another ride in it in the future, as it was brilliant while it lasted.

So, I’d managed to get myself a ride as navigator in Chris Temple’s first event. I’d never met him before (the joys of the Internet!), but got to Down Ampney around 7:30, and actually before he’d turned up. He’d got scrutineered the night before, so it was easy to get ourselves all done – just check my suit and helmet, and then sign on. We were ready to go.

Chris’ car is a mini, and I’d not been in one for years – since I last owned one in ’91, I think. Luckily I still fitted, and into a nice seat and harness, too. We went off to the first stage with plenty of time in hand, and I gave Chris some advice. I remember how nerve-racking it was to do my first event (I still get nervous now!), and kept reinforcing the mantra that a finish was the main objective for the day.

I’ve not been to Down Ampney before, but it was (to me) more interesting than many SV events, because there were different surfaces – a bit of gravel, some mud (some of the cars coming off of SS1 were filthy), quite a bit of poo and so on, and a few rough places as well. The stage layout was interesting, and there were a few dodgy moments on SS1, and the rear of the car was all over the place – the road tyres Chris had one were not very grippy at all, and quite ‘interesting’. But SS1 was done with no real drama, and Chris was unable to speak for a bit – I was worried he was crestfallen, but in fact he was too excited. Excellent.

SS2 was a repeat, and Chris had a real “pendulum” moment – 2 over-compensations led us off the road – no real damage, but a bit stuck. And right in front of Lee Harding and his brother! Ah, how we laughed! Got Chris calmed down, got the car started and waited for 2 cars to pass, Lee pushed us out, and we were away again. There were a couple of other moments, but it was going OK, all things considered. You certainly feel “in touch” with the road in a mini – you’re so low and there’s so little that separates you from the road (or anyting else), so it’s a bit like being on a roller skate. Fun though.

The next few stages went OK – each time I was trying to get Chris to be smoother, not over-compensate or over-drive the car, and also to plan ahead what was going to happen. And each time it was an improvement – times were coming down (apart from SS2, but even then we only lost 6 seconds, not bad considering a spin and an oversteer-off), and he was having fun. An over-cut corner led to a bent rim and slightly off steering, but nothing serious.

However, on stage 8, we were following a car that was on lap 2, and at the split we were to turn left. The other car turned right, and I was saying “left, left”, but Chris did the thing that’s so natural to do, and followed the car in front! We’d gone past the point of no return, so had to finish the stage (only losing a mile, which was handy) and taking a stage maximum. As it turned out, without this he wouldn’t have been the last finisher, but never mind. Each moment or error was meaning something was learned, and that was the point, as far as I could see. Nothing was bad enough to lead to any “proper” or day-ending damage, so it was all good.

By the end of the day, Chris was driving much better, not over-driving the car, braking more decisively, later and smoothly, steering better and correcting the car more accurately when it was getting out of shape (which was still often, although a lot less with 25psi instead of the original 32!). Better tyres and brake pads would be the best upgrade for the car, and then time for some more events!

Every now and then, something good happens completely out of the blue. I wasn’t expecting to do any navigating this year, and a chance message on a forum led to me meeting a few people from the forum, having a good day out with Chris, Kev and Andy (Kev will be navving for him in the future), and hopefully giving Chris a decent return for his faith in having me as a nav and driving instructor!

So, the final event was upon us. The new Scafftex Stages at Longcross, which was looking like a Mk.2 Showdown from the entry list. We got there in plent of time on the Sunday morning, despite it being my birthday the day before (spent the night in – how dedicated am I?), and found, well a whole load of very hardcore-looking cars there already. Parked up next to Gary Hayter (in his lovely Mk.2) and got all the usual scrutineering, etc, out of the way. No problems, which was nice.

If you don’t know Longcross, I’ll just set the scene (skip this bit if you do). It’s a military test track, and the outside is really a large, banked oval. There are some other tracks inside that, one of which is the ‘snake’ which is a series of large-radius 180 degree bends, which go up and down hill as well, and some of it is off-camber. Add to that the ‘tank hill’ which is a set of parallel, steep hills (about 100 feet high, and the one we use is 1 in 4, I believe), you have the ability to set up some interesting tracks.

The weather, however, was a bit of a problem. Longcross can be quite slick early on as there are trees in a number of places (including in the infamous ‘snake’ section), and it was a bit damp – threatening to rain, and because of, er, budget restrictions (i.e. being towards the end of the summer I’d run out of money, basically), we didn’t have any wets. So I took a gamble and put some road tyres on the back, and some ‘inters’ on the front and headed off to stage 1.

Oh dear. Dear, oh dear. Note to self – don’t skimp on tyres. We were all over the place, not helped by my poor navigation on the first splits (which were closer together than they appeared when I’d looked at them before), and Paul was having some moments. Every corner. I consoled him by telling him this is what the car feels like on gravel all the time, but we got round OK, but with neither speed nor style. I was glad to just get out of the car in one piece after that. But the weather had dried up a bit, so we went for the usual setup and also re-set the pressures as the front had got quite high when warm, so dropping them down a fair bit and putting decent rears on, we headed out for Stage 2. This was infinitely better – much more like it, and we started to have a laugh. And went up the steep hill a little too quickly, got airborne and took out a few cones and scattered the photographers! It was probably only 6 inches off the ground, but when you’re doing it it feels like you’re miles up! The end of stage 2 was a square right bend, and Paul was getting a bit OTT at this point, and nearly span it. Most amusing.

Stage 3 was a slightly different layout, but there was a problem after the first chicane – the rear right strut had punched through the rubber mounting (bad design), and was effectively useless – the spring was still working, but no damping so the car was bobbing all over the place. But we got round (taking it a bit easy) and fixed in in service using a massive square washer and a bit of filing. Stage 4, the re-run was much better. With the car behaving itself we just had fun all the way round, really.

Stage 5 was a reverse of the previous stage, which was ‘interesting’. Partly because the corners are totally different when in reverse, but for me as much because the big uphill became a big downhill, and the top of it you almost jump off of – it’s a sudden break from flat to incline, and that was a little hairy and always leaves you will ‘that’ feeling (only owners of male reproductive organs will know what I mean – a sharp drop is often felt there). But apart from that, it was all good fun again – Paul was driving well, although he kept lifting on one part of the snake (a blind crest) and I told him not to – you could do it without, for sure. But throughout the day, he’d just do a little confidence lift there, and unfortunately for him, I could see his right foot, so no excuses there! Stage 6 was a re-run of this, and the main point of note was someone had destroyed their lovely Rothmans Mk.2 Escort – one of the chicanes around the outside was now in fragments the size of matches, and his car looked like it had been crumpled up by a giant. They were OK though, and it meant one less chicane to worry about! Oh, and the legend that is Billy Coleman gave us the thumbs up when he passed us, which was nice.

Stage 7, another ‘reverse’ stage, but someone had dropped oil at the top of the steep drop – there’s a long left hand corner leading into it, and it was right on the line. Paul hadn’t noticed this, which made for some ‘interesting’ sliding about. All good though, and the snake was getting better and better – each time we were quicker through it (I use ‘quicker’ as obviously it’s relative!), although there was a stroppy driver in a Nova who was impatient when lapping us – we’re not going to jump out of the way, for one, and secondly, he was beeping the horn way before reaching us. One time we were behind him in the snake, and over all that time he only made about 10 yards on us. The skoda may be slow on the straights, but it’s good in the corners. Stage 8 was a straight rerun of 7, and was an immense amount of fun. We got the snake spot on every time, and had a huge laugh. Even more so at the top of the steep hill as there was a marshal who was already packing up, not realising we were still running. So when we appeared at the plateau, she was suprised to say the least! Down we went, over the finish, and, well, that was that.

We did it. Six events, six finishes. I’m sure by hardcore rallying standards we were just pootling about, but we drove the car pretty quickly, all things considered.

Total cost:

Entry fees: 6 events – ?1200
Fuel for car ?150
Fuel for tow car ?250
Tyres ?200
Gearbox ?50
Brake Pads ?80
Miscellaneous ?150

So, to get Paul’s International licence has cost around ?2000. Which sounds like a lot, but it’s six days on which we’ve had a really good time. And cheaper than most would do it I’d think – the Skoda may be slow, but it’s been very reliable. God, I sound like an old fart!

Now, we have to get everything for WRGB!

Single venue rallies often take place on disused airfields, most often on ones that were made during WW2. As you can imagine, they have usually gone somewhat downhill, meaning they’re rough, broken up and can present quite a challenge to the car in places. So it was quite a pleasant surprise when we went to Colerne airfield, North Wiltshire, to find that it’s a currently-used airbase, and the runway could only be described as billiard-table smooth. I’ve been on rougher race tracks. We got there at 8am, and found that everyone had left the best place for us – right by the burger bar and toilets. It was so well arranged that we didn’t even need to un-hitch the trailer, so we were completely lazy – just drive the car off, and there you go.

Scrutineering may have taken a while (big queue), but was done by the most pleasant, jokey scrutineer I’ve met, ever. It’s always my least favourite part of the day (as there’s the spectre of not being allowed to compete, despite never having failed scrutineering), but this was nice, and everyone in the queue (including Peter Hopkins, who built N158 UBD) was a good laugh. Splendid.

The big downside of airfield events in the Felicia is power. Or rather the near total absense of it. Reason being is that there are long straights – sometimes half a mile long. And in that time the big boys will be doing 130, and getting there very quickly. There was NO car yesterday that was as slow as we are in a straight line – I’m almost certain we were in the only standard car, and even the minis were eating us alive in the straights. But in the corners, we can hold our own, and even make time up on people. Moan over!

So, stage 1 was , well, the first stage. Where we were we could see the queue for the arrival control so there was no problem with timing, etc, and we could be relaxed – indeed this was probably the least nerve-racking day I’ve ever had rallying. Off we went, and found a really nice course, with very well-made chicanes (once you’d worked out what to look for, they were really clear, but the first one was a bit confusing until we got near to it), and generally a good fun stage on some very smooth tarmac – there were a few surprises (including a “long bar chicane” which had lots of dirt/grass on it, which was a slide-off-the-road job) but all good fun and with little of substance to hit and damage the car. We did OK, and the tyres (which were poor on SS1 of Fat Albert) were fine this time out, right out of the box. There were no real dramas on this, and the re-run (SS2) was a good 20 seconds faster.

SS3 had some minimal changes from SS1/2, and was more fun – Paul was starting to get into it a bit, but still being careful so we’d finish. There were some ‘interesting’ noises coming from the engine/box, but it turned out it was just the engine moving a little (not much at all) and tapping the sumpguard) – every time he changed down a gear there was a “clunk”, but it was OK all day. The re-run of this was again quicker than the previous, so that left us half way through the day with the sun still shining (despite some cloud), and with a lengthy break for Paul to hear Liverpool’s poor start to the season!

SS5 was the first “reversed” stage, and there was quite a delay before it started, so we all queued up, 4 cars wide. This gave us 20 minutes to do two things – firstly, see others’ start techniques. If you’ve never seen the start line of a rally stage, then it’s easy to think everyone would look the same, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Firstly, not everyone gives it total death from the start – some are quite reserved, while others just hit the rev limiter and drop the clutch, leaving the tyres to do all the work, with wonderful (but probably not very good for the car) results. But it’s not just that – the difference between the cars is also important. A 4wd car just seems to be pulled by an invisible force – very little wheelspin, just being catapaulted forwards at unreasonable speed. The RWD cars look best – wheelspinning, making lots of noise, and going quickly, but not as fast as the 4WD cars. Finally, there’s the FWD cars, which spin a fair bit more, but some of them really shift. So that was fun. However, there was far more fun – there was a bend which was new, and seeing people come down to that and get it a bit (or in some cases totally and utterly) wrong, and then watch the marshals play ‘replace the cones’ was very good fun. The stage itself was good fun, and Paul was getting much better at using the full width of the track and braking a bit nearer the mark.

SS6 was a bit damp – there had been a bit of rain in the service area, but not enough to worry about. But the far side of the stage was quite wet, and when we got out there (on dry tyres), there were some…er…. moments! We were only 12 seconds slower than the previous time, so not too bad (some lots plenty more, some less).

And then the rain came. What I can only describe as a downpour of biblical proportions occurred – I stepped outside the Pajero to check our start time, and was instantly soaked. This was a problem – as I don’t do a lot of tarmac (and ‘cos Paul killed the previous wets), I don’t have a big supply of tyres. So I’d brought some standard, cheapo remould tyres (off the car I broke a while back), “just in case it really chucks it down”. Well, it was really chucking it down, so we bunged ’em on, with just minutes to spare. Paul was a little worried about using these tyres (because they were thin and cheap), but I was sure they’d be the best choice. Looks like I was right – there was a remarkable amount of grip, given that the stage was covered in standing water – there was a bit of 70mph aquaplaning, and the sound of the water on the bottom of the car was quite loud. We did well considering all this, and looking at other cars going round made me realise just how wet it really was – the other cars seemed to be going through a river. When we got to the previously dirty chicane, it was now a puddle. I said to just “go for it”, and we did – the splash was great, and there was a car broken down just after it, which looked to have given in to the water! Second lap was just as fun, but no-one there to photograph it.

SS8, the last of the day, was a re-run. The rain had mostly stopped in the service area, but the track was still soaking, so we stuck with the tyres we had (partly from laziness!), and off we went. It was going OK, until we got caught by someone in a Mk.2 who was being, frankly an impatient git. He nearly hit us and in our attempts to get out of the way we hit a cone (not the first of the day!), and it got stuck under the front of the car. I thought it would just ping off, but it didn’t. We did half a lap with it there until I told Paul to pull over and reverse off it, as the smell was terrible, it was actually slowing us down, and pushing water over the front of the car. Despite this issue, we still beat the old time by nearly 10 seconds, so it would have been much, much faster if not for that.

But we finished. Overall, a great day (oh, and overall, 38th!), and (a tedious hour later) another signature.

That makes us 5 for 5. And only one more to go. Longcross, September 3rd. Three days after that, the regs for WRGB come out, and we’re one step closer to realising a dream.

This weekend was always going to be a bit different to the other events I’ve done with Paul. Firstly, it’s quite a way away – 170 miles, in fact, so the longest trip for any of the events we’re going to do (about as far as I’ve been doing any rally, in fact), and secondly it wasn’t tarmac, it was to feature a mixture of surfaces – concrete, gravel, tarmac, grass and, it turned out, cow poo!

Firstly, we had to stay somewhere on Saturday night, which meant a twin room at a pub in Burnham on Crouch, not too far from the rally, but when they said “basic twin” they weren’t kidding. The worst beds I’ve seen in a long time (they did a passable impression of a banana once you’d laid on them), and the room was infested with Crane Flies – as we’d see the next day, Essex is the insect capital of England, if not Europe. And it was hot in there too. We had to watch the inevitable failure of England to get through a penalty shoot-out (which I must be getting used to now as it was only half an hour before I’d forgotten about it), and then a restless night’s sleep with the locals making a LOT of noise. Wonderful!

Sunday dawned crystal-clear and warm, and we got to the event on time, but it seemed everyone else was late – you were supposed to arrive in numerical order, and while I was offloading, number 27 turned up. When we’d got scrutineered and signed on, number 15 arrived. This would set the pattern for the day – it’s certainly not a complaint; this was the most relaxed stage rally I’ve ever taken part in.

In addition to being a mixed surface event, it’s also the only Multi-Venue event we’ll be doing – the others are based at a single airfield or similar, whereas this event featured four areas, so we needed to drive on the road between stages, which is a challenge as you have to follow ‘tulips’ which show junctions and distances, but as both of us had done these before (although the other way round) this would be no problem, we hoped.

Stage 1 was a little one based on a disused airfield by Bradwell nuclear power station. The course was pretty tight, and as it was Paul’s first time driving the car on the gravel tyres and also his first time driving a car on the loose, we took it easy. Immediately he found that it behaves quite differently, and it took the first stage to get the hang of, it, with some unintentional understeer and a couple of times with the back getting loose under braking. His sense of smell isn’t great, which was a bonus as some of the stage was marked out by what had to be the biggest pile of poo I’ve ever seen! There was a moment where we got caught out by a really tight hairpin, but that worked out OK, but that was that. We looped round and did Stage 2 which was much like 1, but with a different ending. No problems, then off to SS3. This was the first one involving grass, based on a massive farm, so there was also concrete and tarmac to take care of as well as a bit of gravel. Already someone had gone off (grass tells tales, you see), and despite it being dry, it was bouncy and therefore a bit random in places. Also, the maps weren’t totally accurate, so some note-making was done on any stage we’d re-run so we could take it more quickly/safely next time. Finally in this loop was Stage 4 which was a re-run of stage 1, and there were no real problems there – Paul was getting the hang of things and just trying to go faster.

Back to ‘service’, which involved eating, mostly. There’s not a lot to do on the Felicia, apart from check things over, so we just made sure the wheels wouldn’t fall off. They didn’t, all day.

Next up were two stages that were new and a fair distance away, so we had a half hour road section. Now, what I should mention here is that it was a really hot day by now, so it was getting pretty hot in the car. And it’d been dry for a long time, too. Which made the ground reasonably predictable, but also meant it was pretty dusty. When we arrived at Stage 5, Coney Hall, a 2.6 mile farm-based stage, there was a delay, and it was a chance to hide in the shade while the problem was cleared. Once we got going, it was one of those stages where you just wished you had a really, really quick car – there were a couple of long straights (one about a mile long) where you could go absolutely flat out (we were, but when I say ‘flat out’, I’m not really thinking of a 68bhp Skoda), so a quick car would make up a lot of time. And next up was the mothership, Wraywick. This is an 8 mile stage, with just about every surface – gravel, grass, concrete, tarmac, and mixtures of them too. The first gravel section was really fun as there wasn’t anything to hit if it went wrong apart from some wheat. But nothing went wrong. The maps were a little deceptive though! Then there was a bumpy grass section, and then the ditches appeared. Most of them ran parallel to the track we were on, and they were fairly deep, so if you’d had a couple of bad bounces there would be a problem. Above about 55 was getting hairy, so we just kept around that speed with the throttle helping pull the car in the right direction. There were a couple of bounces that seemed dodgy at the time, but I’m sure they weren’t anything bad in hindsight. Another tarmac section and more gravel, and then more long, bumpy straights. This one had a little surprise though – someone’s car in it! It showed how deep the ditch was – the car was on its side, and you could only see the upper doors and rear light. Not good at all! We passed on the opportunity to join them, and made it to the end of the stage, although on all the straights Paul needed to towel down, which made for some interesting drifting if he chose to close his eyes!

Next we were off to Service 2, which was at a different service location. Except, of course, we don’t have a service crew, so we were just going to pull in and order a hot dog from the catering trailer. Except just as we were getting there, they were leaving! DISASTER!!!! So, we just nosed around, and cooled off using the hose there. There had been a Mk2 Escort behind us on the last stage, but he’d not been able to get too close due to the huge plume of dust we’d chucked up behind us. And it turned out he’d also crushed his exhaust as well, so things weren’t going well for them. Then there were re-runs of the last two stages which went OK – we were over the half way point by now, so no point in having a moment. I’d made notes on the last two stages so we could go quicker, which paid off – certainly a lot less hairy, despite things having cut up and become more bumpy in places. Back to service 3…. for the hot dog I’d promised myself an hour previously!

The rest of the stages were re-runs, of the airfield and Stage 3. Each time it was getting better, with Paul getting things more together, although still taking it easy so we could get a finish and a signature. So, no heroics (aside from an intentional sideways moment which just elicited a “you knob” comment from me!), but we did get to the end of Stage 12, and even get back without needing fuel at any point – because of the low speeds involved and not wheelspinning all over the place, it was probably quite economical overall!

Once we were at the finish, got the most important thing – a signature from the Clerk of the Course. This means we’re 50% of the way to Paul getting his licence so we can do WRGB. And that’s a 100% finishing record for him as a driver. We can only go in one direction from there, alas. But let’s hope that doesn’t happen too soon.

It was a long slog home (4 hours, including stops) with the trusty, rusty trailer, and the car is absolutely filthy – every single part of the car (inside and out) is dusty, and it’s a sort of clingy, clay-like dust which is a pig to remove. So I’ve got a LOT of cleaning to do, and a few minor things to fix before the next outing, Fat Albert Stages, 29th July.

This weekend will see our furthest-away event, the Essex Charity Stages – not an event I’ve been to before. It offers 45 miles of stages for ?165, which compares very well to most multi-venue events, but that’s because it uses farm tracks and disused airfields, rather than mind-meltingly expensive Forestry Commission tracks.

Being a navigator has turned out to be a lot more fun than I thought it would. With one exception, and that was today. I had to get us some accomodation, and spent a fruitless hour on the Internet and phone trying to find us somewhere within a decent distance of the event, and finally did. I hate using the phone, so making 20 pointless phone calls wasn’t a great way to spend half the morning. So I spent the rest of it fixing the car (various little things here and there, nothing major), and making sure it’s all OK. So far, so good.

But there are a few challenges this weekend. Firstly, it’s my first multi-venue event navigating, which should be OK, but I have NO IDEA what the road books, etc, will be like – usually you get the road book (which tells you where to go throughout the day) by post, so you can peruse it before the event (or in Paul’s case, ignore it completely!), but we’ll be getting this when we sign on, probably around 8am on Sunday morning. So no time to plan anything else. And the paperwork I’ve had so far looked, well, let’s say it was a bit sparse, and leave it at that.

Next problem – there are two service areas. This is something that always causes me a problem, because we don’t ever have a service crew. So what we do is leave the Pajero in the service area with all the stuff (OK, a toolbox and some spare wheels) in it. But when you have two service areas, you can’t do that. Well, you can, but if you need something and you’re at one and it’s at the other, you’re stuffed. This happened on Newton Abbot stages last year, but luckily there was no drama. So we’ll have to be uber-careful to not need anything at Service 2. And carry a couple of spare wheels and a few choice things in the toolbag of doom in the back of the car. What I really need for occasions like this is Sport Billy’s bag. That would do nicely.

Rallying is great fun. I found that out on the very first event I did, at Smeatharpe, all the way back in 2004 – seems like a lifetime ago. Most people take it far more seriously than me, in terms of financial investment, but even at the lowly level that I run at, it can be an expensive hobby. Let’s look at the costs for Abingdon last weekend:

Entry: ?205.
Fuel (there and back): ?50
Fuel (on event): ?30
Tyres (cheap): ?30
Car preparation (routine): ?50

So, for the day that was a total of ?365. And that is incredibly cheap, ‘cos we basically just turned up and ran the car for the day, put fuel in, and then went home. It’s fairly sturdy, but that’s still ?180 each for the day.

As a result of this, I sometimes take on work that I wouldn’t normally do, but I’ll think that I can earn as much in a day as I can spend at a rally, so I’m even over the two days. And that happened this weekend – I was doing Caerwent on the Sunday, and had been offered a chance to do an event which I’d done last year on the Saturday, Dinton Jazz Jamboree. It wasn’t the kind of thing I normally do (providing a PA), but I thought I’d do it anyway. But after I’d agreed (and entered Caerwent), I found out that the event had been lengthened to finish at 11:15 instead of the 10pm of last year. Not good. And these things always run over time. So to cut a long story short, I didn’t get to bed until 1:10am. And had to be up at 4am to go to Caerwent. Not a good start, but we got there OK, with 10 minutes to spare, despite having a Sat Nav software crash meaning I missed a turning and did a dodgy detour!

I left Paul to get the car scrutineered and noise tested as I think it’s time he sees the full terror of all that stuff, and I went and set up in the service area. For once, we had everything nicely set up, and all seemed well. Scrutineering went OK, and we signed on, and then off we went.

Now, I’ve been to Caerwent 3 times before, but this time was quite a change as it was being run “in reverse”, so much of what we’d learned would be redundant, apart from “be bloody careful!”, which would be the watchword of the day. We decided to take a long-term view of the day as finishing was the main objective, to get the second of those valuable signatures.

Stage 1 was upon us fairly quickly, and the first thing I found was that if I didn’t keep a finger in my place on the map as we went round, I’d get lost. If you’ve not seen a map (and if you’ve not competed there, you won’t have done) of Caerwent, then you might think this is silly, but it’s really quite complex, and much of the map can be confused with other parts – imagine a randomly-dropped piece of spaghetti that doesn’t overlap itself but comes close to doing so and you won’t be far off. So I took to looking like a 7 year-old with poor reading skills, which helped greatly. Paul was driving very conservatively on the first stage, but this was fine by me, getting used to the car again, and getting an idea of how slippy things were; the problem here is that the surface can change quite quickly from smooth, grippy tarmac to gravel or broken tarmac, and suddenly…. you’re off!

Stage 2 was a re-run, and without any bravado, a minute was taken off the previous time. Nothing else to report other than improved confidence and braking, although still quite cautious.

Stage 3 involved some changes, but mostly to the end – there was a new section which was where I’d broken down the time that we just did one mile before the driveshaft broke in the Favorit. To say it was dodgy was an understatement. Not really tarmac at all – there were car-battery sized rocks (and pieces of kerb) all over the place, and Paul did well to keep us going and pick through the lot of them without too much trouble. We then headed into a section where it was hard to see where we should go – no arrows, no tape, and if it wasn’t for a group of marshals, we probably wouldn’t have had a clue. Very, very slippy here first time through as well, gravel on tarmac,so all sorts of slidey fun! Didn’t hit anything though, and caught up with a nova going very slowly.

Stage 4 was another re-run, but this time we had a spin – sometimes Paul doesn’t get all his braking done soon enough, and re-brakes in a corner entry, and this spun us round in an awkward spot – we got going before we were caught, but probably lost 20 seconds between that and the next thing we hit – there was a 4″ reinforced concrete post in the middle of the road that we hit – I was reading the map at the time and didn’t see it, but I heard and felt it. We got to the end of the stage without event, but the sumpguard was definitely bent as a result, and this is the thick, forest, 10mm aluminium one!

Now the tiredness was kicking in. On the stage I was OK, but between (particularly queueing before the start) I was feeling pretty tired.

Stage 5 involved some minor changes, including taking out a ‘bus stop’ detour meaning we could take a couple of corners flat in 4th gear which was fun, and Paul was getting far more on it as we went now, although still braking conservatively for the most part, which is fine by me – we were having fun, but staying on the safe side of things as the finish is everything.

Stage 6, much the same again – getting some corners better, and taking some safe cuts, although there were a couple which were a cut too far and resulted in more sumpguard action! Still, that’s what it’s there for, isn’t it?

Finally, Stage 7. By now, things were settling into a pattern, and we were at the back of the field, but only 22 seconds adrift. On the first stage and stage 4 (the spin!), we’d lost time to the mini that was ahead of us, but the rest of the stages we were faster than them. 24 seconds was the amount we’d made up on the last stage, so it was possible that we could get out of last place. But we had to make sure of a finish as well. Paul drove really neatly on this last stage, but we only took 11 seconds out of them, so we finished in last, but we finished.

We had to wait half an hour to get Paul’s licence signed (in case there were any protests), so by the time we went, the place was completely deserted. It took 2 cans of red bull on the way home to keep me going, and as I write this now (Monday morning), I’m still tired. But it was worth it.

We’re 2 for 2. Next up, Essex Charity Stages, July 2nd. And that’s not tarmac!

So, this was to be Paul’s first rally of (hopefully) six, to get his International licence…..

After yesterday’s issues, I was dreading another ‘little’ problem stopping us from even getting there let alone competing, but I woke up nice and early (5:45) and got there by 8am, which was really good. It was quite busy there, but we got a space by Gary Hayter, which meant we could shelter in the shadow from his EZ-Up which was very handy. Got all the maps ready, and then realised I was as nervous as if I was driving, but this was probably because I was worried about the car. Anyway, off we went, and did Stage 1, which was taking it relatively easy as Paul had never driven the car before, but it went OK. He was a bit ragged (well, quite a lot), but we didn’t hit anything, although there were a couple of close moments in the tight areas by the bomb dumps. Second run was a bit better and neater, although it being sunny meant it was already getting quite hot in the car, and it was still before 11am. We got caught up by car 83, who overtook us and then promptly span in front of us, so we overtook him. Down the next straight he was catching us, but not enough to overtake yet, we could let him past on the next straight, but he had other ideas, and I was alarmed to see his bonnet right by my window. It could have got messy, but thankfully (luck/judgement? Who knows!) we didn’t hit. But it was damn close. Stage 3 was a slight change, but getting better again, but Paul took it a little close to a chicane and BANG! off went his mirror. Which was a problem because we were being lapped by faster traffic and not seeing them could be fatal, especially considering what had already happened!

However, there was worse to come. Car 100, a Suzuki Swift (very nice, tidy car, and pretty quick) was nearly catching us each time towards the end of the run, but not enough to actually overtake us. But at the end of stage 4, we were running through the last ‘bus stop’ chicane, and they were about 5 seconds behind. And Paul overdid it, went into the last corner too fast and hit the pallets on the exit (which had moved each time, and I’d called them as being tight, but there you go….). And I looked in the remaining mirror and saw the car coming, and then…. skid…. BANG! They’d hit us, fairly hard, it seemed. They backed up, and got free, and I could see in the mirror that their headlamp was smashed, indicator gone, bumper, bonnet and wing beaten in. I didn’t want to look at the back of the car, but we had the last mile or so of the stage to cover anyway, so off we went once we’d de-beached the car. We got to the end, and then back to service. I had a look and…. nothing looked broken! The bumper was a bit scratched and had some dents in it, but that was it really – had a look behind the bumper and there was a dented panel, but that was it. Went to see the Swift guys who were putting a brave face on it, but they didn’t seem happy, but it’s my opinion that if you’re behind a car you want to keep clear of it until you’re not going to hit them. I asked if I could have my green paint back…..

Anyway, the next stages were more of the same – reversals of the previous stages, so some of the corners were a bit awkward as they might have been wide exits and were now tight. Paul was getting a bit better, but we had a fuel issue (it was drinking the stuff), so before Stage 6 we drove off to the petrol station and filled up! Saves on jerry cans, or waiting round the service area, for sure. But now we had some fuel we went for it again, and all went well. In short, we kept it nice and tight, and finished.

1 down. 5 to go.

Caerwent is next. This will be a serious challenge, as nearly every corner is kerbed, and one error will mean game over. A finish there will be a real achievement.

So, last year’s Somerset was Paul’s first event as a navigator, but we broke a driveshaft. So this year we wanted to finish the event as it features some really good stages, and also two runs up the tarmac of Porlock toll road. But, as I said in my last entry, the new engine wasn’t running at all well.

Scrutineering, etc, was on the Friday, so I set off around lunchtime, and has a real problem about half way there – one of the tyres on the trailer blew out, and I didn’t have a spare. I had to crawl along for half a mile to find somewhere to put the car and trailer, and in that time a pretty big queue had developed behind me. Whoops! There was, however, a bonus – a few cars back was an AA van, and the driver stopped. I’m in the AA, so it was very, very handy that he stopped, and we took the wheel off and went off to a local tyre place, who fitted a tyre for just ?10. Nice. What wasn’t so nice was that TomTom decided I should take the most convoluted B-road route to Minehead, and the windyness and people coming the other way led to chronic brake fade that was worryingly bad at the end.

So, got to Minehead, and thankfully went through scrutineering OK, and got everything set up in service. I always find that once scrutineering is done, I can actually concentrate on the event – before that, there’s always the spectre of something being wrong meaning problems and possibly not starting the event, although this hasn’t ever actually happened!

Saturday dawned a little cold and slightly murky, but certainly nowhere near as bad as last year, just a bit of mist. We set off for Stage one, and there was a real problem – the car was really slow – getting up the hill to the first stage start was a bit of a trial, but we’d just have to live with it and hope it got better as the day went on. Stage one was fairly good – the hills were a problem, and the car wouldn’t really pull past 3rd gear, but at long last I finally felt like I could drive on gravel – I did the autocross on Weston Super-Mare beach a couple of weeks ago, and used that as practice for getting the car sideways and dealing with it without panic. Now that skill was becoming handy – most corners had me with the car finally out of line, and not worrying at all about it. However, we weren’t going well as the engine wasn’t pulling at all well. I thrashed it on the road section (keeping to the speed limit, just keeping in 2nd gear), to try to clear it out, but to no avail. Stage 2 was good fun again, apart from the hills (which every stage seemed to have more ups than downs, but I guess that’s ‘cos they were over in the blink of an eye versus the slow-motion of going uphill at what was now 25mph). Stage 3 was good too, a little slippy in places, but good fun, as was Stage 4, despite being caught by the car behind – once he’d passed us, we kept up OK in the corners, so really it was the car that was the problem, not me, for once! Before stage 5 there was a small delay, so I told the car behind us that we would be slow, and I’d move over as soon as I could. Again, this stage had some big hills in it, but the downhill sections were great. There were a couple of moments, one of which was downhill, and where you’d usually put the wheels in the right direction and hit the power to pull the car straight, there being no power made for an interesting couple of swerves, but I held it. Paul actually went a bit quiet for the first time ever!

Although it was slow, I thought it’d just be a case of “deal with it”, but it wasn’t to be. Shortly after that, the engine died completely. It looks as if the fuel pump has failed, as it would turn over OK and fire but then die, and I couldn’t hear the pump running. So that was that. Twice we’ve entered the Somerset, and twice we’ve not finished.

Anyone who knows me will know I could find the negative in just about any situation. However, this time it wasn’t the case – after the initial round of loud swear words (I only did 2 this time, a vast improvement) and feeling bad for 15 minutes, I realised that apart from that, it’d been a success – I can now control the car OK on gravel, and seeing some of the people coming past after us showed us that we are doing pretty well, really. Not stellar, but competent. We had the pleasure of the company of Shaun Gardener and Ben Innes as their Evo 5 broke both front shafts on the corner where we’d gone out, so we had a little parking lot there, and it made the time pass a fair bit more quickly, and they also did me the favour of giving me a lift back to service so I could pick up the trailer and come to get the Skoda. A big thanks to them and their service crew – they were gobsmacked that we don’t have a service crew!

There was a final insult added to injury – when the Doctor came past he offered to tow us out, and as soon as he tried to pull us out…. the towing eye broke on the Felicia. So that’s another thing on the list of things to do, although the front crossmember has always been shabby, so I think I’ll change the whole thing.

Anyway, there’s lots to do – I think the new engine was duff anyway, as it never seemed happy, and a new fuel pump will be ordered tomorrow. In addition, there’s a growing list of little things to do. This is probably my last forest event before Wales Rally GB which is a big disappointment, but with the current entry costs, I can’t see being able to afford to do WRGB and another event, unless I get some serious sponsorship for WRGB, which is something I will be working on as I think that doing a WRC event in a car which is 11 years old and basically standard (in ‘proper, old-school’ Group N terms) is worth some coverage, and it could prove to be extremely cheap advertising for someone’s company.